(INT. JOHN IS WALKING THROUGH THE BACK
OF THE THEATRE AND COMES UPON PATRICIA
NEAL WASHING DISHES, AS SHE WOULD HAVE
APPEARED IN THE FILM 'HUD'. A PLAY IS HEARD
IN THE BACKGROUND, INTERUPTED OCASSION-
ALLY BY THE SOUND OF CHICKENS CUKKLING
AND COWS MOOING.)
JOHN
Selma, what are you doing here?
NEAL
What's it look like I'm doing Honey? I'm washing dishes!
That's what I do 'round here! I wash dishes! ...Do you
have an extra smoke on you?
JOHN
Yea sure! Where's Hud tonight?
NEAL
Who knows with him! I'm just glad he's out of the house for
a while. I need the time away from him. You know what a
pill he can be!
JOHN
Yea, sure! Hey listen, can you come over here and talk
to me?
NEAL
Is this close enough Honey?
JOHN
I just wanted to light your cigerette for you properly.
(JOHN PULLS NEAL CLOSE TO HIM)
NEAL
You're such a gentleman!
JOHN
And then some? And you feel so good! You have a
womanly body! And you're a big girl too! You're
bigger than you appear on the big screen. I like that!
Can I get a kiss?
(NEAL KISSES JOHN LIGHTLY ON CHEEK)
What's up with the Hollywood kiss? That's how you would
kiss your grandmother! Now try again sweetheart! I don't
want any tongue. I just want a kiss!
NEAL
Okay!
(THEY KISS)
JOHN
I think you're beautiful! You're gorgeous! I like everything
about you! Are you Italian?
NEAL
No, I'm from Georgia!
JOHN
On both sides?
NEAL
No, just my Mother's! My Father's from Spain!
JOHN
A Conquistador! Can I get another kiss?
(THEY KISS)
You feel so good! I think I'm in love with you.
NEAL
I have a five-month old baby!
JOHN
Your lips are so soft!
NEAL
And a very sickly mother!
JOHN
Can I touch you there?
NEAL
I've had my fill of cocaine and pills!
JOHN
Do you have any now?
NEAL
I was abused as a child!
JOHN
That feels so good! You're so beautiful! Can you make
a pounding noise?
NEAL
Under certain circumstances! Why do you ask? Why are
you telling me this?
JOHN
Are you a backdoor girl?
NEAL
Once! In Branson Missouri! But I've never told anyone,
not even Hud.
JOHN
Tell me all about you! That's all I want to know.
NEAL
I was sixteen. Out on my own for the very first time!
JOHN
I bet you were gorgous.
NEAL
I was! Big breasted and small hipped!
JOHN
Sweet sixteen!
NEAL
I was legal! And I didn't have a care in the world.
JOHN
Were you wearing that apron?
NEAL
Yes, I was working in a truckstop...
JOHN
Serving coffee...
NEAL
And dounuts...Yes! He caught my eye as soon as he
came in the door. A tall lanky boy with blond curls and
ocean blue eyes. I could make out the faint sound of
drumming. Jungle drums in a rain forest far far away.
Wet and succulent plants all around me. Wild animals
crying out in the night! A band of Zulu warriors slowing
circling 'round....
JOHN
Was it a Tarzen movie? I don't know what to think of you
honey.
NEAL
Don't think too hard because that's how I've had it! Hard and
dirty! My poor dirt farm daddy worked himself to death in
them tobacco fields. My poor fat mother went crazy! My
baby sister caught ditheria!
JOHN
Come closer. I only want you. Can I touch you under
your apron?
NEAL
But why?
JOHN
Because I like everything about you! And then some! I
love your butt! I just want to be near you and hold you!
NEAL
That's exactly what I want to hear. I want you to know
everything there is to know about me.
JOHN
Can I get another kiss? Your hair is so soft!
NEAL
Do you have a hair fetish?
JOHN
I do! And yours is absolutely perfect. Are these real?
NEAL
You tell me.
(KISS)
JOHN
Have you ever thought about leaving Hud?
8
NEAL
Never!
JOHN
Then who's the bus ticket for?
NEAL
Okay! I thought about it yesterday! Do you want to touch
my tail or not?
JOHN
Do babies like breast milk?
(NEAL TURNS ONE QUARTER AROUND AND
BEGINS TO DROP HER DRAWERS)
STAGEBOY ENTERS
Sir, richardporter has requested to speak with you
immediately!
JOHN
What could be that important?
STAGEBOY
He says his chicken is missing sir?
JOHN
Well, call in the fucking National Guard! I'm busy here!
(WHEN JOHN TURNS BACK ROUND NEAL HAS
VANISHED.)
FADE OUT
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