The Rain In Spain

So Mr. Porter, we now meet face to face.  Is there anything you'd like to say before we begin this inquiry?

Let me just assure you that within the context of things I think I was rightly justified in the actions that I took.

Mr. Porter, are you familiar with the story of King Lear?

Why, does this have anything to do with King Lear?

Perhaps.

Look, I'm a Shakespeare fan like anyone else so what does Shakespeare have to do with any of this?

Much.

Of course given all of the complexities in this case I'm sure you understand my, how shall we shall, my fondness for language.

But are we not each Mr. Porter made up more than just simple sentences?

One man's simple sentence is another man's compound sentence I always say.

Is your goal here to make a complex sentence?

Sure, why not.  Is there a language law preventing me from doing this?

Mr. Porter, can you explain this sentence to me:  The rain in Spain stays mainly in the plain?

Am I quoted as saying that?

I'm afraid so.

Okay, you guys have me.  Where do I sign?  How much time will this cost me?

Ten to Twenty.

I should be so lucky given that quote.