Friday, December 31, 2010
Thursday, December 30, 2010
Christine O'Donnell To Cast Evil Spell
Christine O'Donnell reportedly under investigation for
misusing campaign funds faced a stunned press today
wearing witches regalia and hissing at small children.
Thankfully someone in the crowd had a bottle of water
and O'Donnell melted into what can only be descibed
as a blob of non sensical silliness that is the Tea Party.
And afterwards everyone began singing Ding Dong The Witch Is Dead! As if on cue!
Said one onlooker: "It was just like being in the Movie!"
Fiesty Sexpot Who Stripped in Objection to TSA Banned From Flight
Tammy Banovac is the 52 year-old ex surgeon and once playboy pinup that made news earlier this month, when she became a hit on youtube, stripping down to just her black lingerie to hopefully pass a TSA checkpoint without having to be at the hands of a screener's, "enhanced pat-down."
She's back in the news this week, this time being banned from a flight due to TSA having found, "traces of nitrate" on her person and also what was described as, "unusual contour on her butt."
TSA has been getting a lot of negative attention as of late, what with the backscatter machines that photograph nearly naked images of passengers and have also been argued to pose severe health risks to those subjected to them or their new enhanced pat-downs that require screeners to nearly grope the crotches of American fliers. I believe that they had every intent not letting this woman make her flight due to her previous objections and highly covered protest to the way they have been conducting themselves.
I feel that TSA is completely ineffectual and as best described, "security theatrics." It's sad that American people are willing to give up their dignity to these people for the sake of supposed, "security."
I can only hope that the increasing heat against TSA will make other airports more willing to opt-out of their security programs, thus helping safeguard the privacy and decent treatment of the public.
Wednesday, December 29, 2010
The Witches Of Washington
Rep. Lynn Jenkins of Kansas looks like many Republican
women: Possessed! And of course like many Republicans
since a black man became President is intent on throwing out
as many crazy ideas that come to her mind. For example in
August 2009 she said the Republican Party needs a "great
white hope" and then this past July she introduced legislation
to prohibit lame duck sessions of congress. I wonder why! We
don't call Republicans reactionary or racist for nothing.
Tuesday, December 28, 2010
The Republican Party - The Party Of Book Burners?
The Republican Party, the Party of Free Loaders, will stop
at nothing to attack anything intellectual. No surprise given
that only 6% of U.S. scientists are Republican. They will
continue their modern day book burning until every American
is as dumb as they are. So, don't be surprised when they
introduce legistlation to shut down America's libraries.
Monday, December 27, 2010
22 Famous Cartoon Characters Rendered in Skeletal Form
 |
| artwork by: Michael Paulus |
"Animation was the format of choice for children's television in the 1960s, a decade in which children's programming became almost entirely animated. Growing up in that period, I tended to take for granted the distortions and strange bodies of these entities.These Icons are usually grotesquely distorted from the human form from which they derive.
I decided to take a select few of these popular characters and render their skeletal systems as I imagine they might resemble if one truly had eye sockets half the size of its head, or fingerless-hands, or feet comprising 60% of its body mass."
Very Sad Day For Music World - Teena Marie Found Dead In Home At Age 54
When the push comes to shove
And you need a little love
Let me put some rock into your world
Call me up don't be shy
Cause my love will make you high
I just want to be your lovergirl
Teena Marie
Sunday, December 26, 2010
Ozzy Osborne Critical of Lady Gaga
Ozzy claims the pop artist is, "too over exposed." What do you think?
MTV, Mommy Teen Viewing
If you feel compelled, for some odd reason, to tune into Mtv nowadays you'll find that a large portion of their programming is dedicated to the shows, 16 and Pregnant or Teen Mom. At any given time of day they will be airing this show, I'm willing to put money on that statement. One would think that given the market for teen pregnancy shows there has to be a large recruiting pool of expectant teen moms. My fiance and I argued about this fact.
She pointed out that clearly teen pregnancy must be continuing to be an epidemic in the United States, and that years ago it wasn't as bad. I countered that the increased exposure leads one to falsely believe this. Guess who was right.
According to the CDC's most recent publication of National Vital Statistics Report for 2009(pdf), the birthrate for those under 20 fell by 6%, marking the lowest level ever recorded in seven decades. This falling trend spread across all race groups and minorities.
So perhaps instead of portraying a trend, these shows are helping curb it instead.
Security Advice From richardporter
This morning when I woke up I noticed that my flat screen
TV had somehow slipped into bed with me.
So today I installed a security camera to keep watch on my
TV.
You can't be too careful these days.
Saturday, December 25, 2010
Dear richardporter
Dear richardporter,
I very much want to post on your blog but I'm not sure what
you're looking for. Can you elaborate on what you're looking
for in a post?
My reply:
It should be lengthy enough to seem substantial yet concise
enough to feel breezy. It should be serious but with a slight
wink. It should lay out a new course of action but one that
can change direction at any moment. If you must mention
facts and figures, don't do so directly.The general thrust
should remain embedded in one's mind forever but specific
words should be forgotten the moment they are heard. It
should contain nothing that can't be confirmed or denied.
Friday, December 24, 2010
For The Parents Out There
NORAD Santa Tracker
Norad is tracking Santa as we speak. As of my current writing, he is presently in Russia!
Norad is tracking Santa as we speak. As of my current writing, he is presently in Russia!
Thursday, December 23, 2010
Softball Coaches for School Out Student as Lesbian
"Two softball coaches at a Texas high school are being sued after allegedly confining a teenaged girl in a locked room, forcing her to confirm her sexual orientation, then outing her to her parents before ejecting her from the softball team."
Read the full story at Raw Story
This is absolutely awful. These two softball coaches had no legal right what-so-ever to detain and interrogate this student. I'm glad that the girl's parents are suing. Both coaches need to be fired immediately with no severance and the school board should have to pay for their homosexual witch hunt.Even the Superintendent of the district should be held liable for her support of this incident.
What To Do With America's Wealthiest? I Wonder What That Could Be.
Not that I would ever condone it but some of my friends have
suggested that America's wealthly should know they have
a target on their backs. And if need be the old French
guillotines are just waiting to be put to good use. Of course
I don't cotton to such notions you see.
The Madonna of the Roses (1903) by William Adolphe Bouguereau
William-Adolphe Bouguereau (November 30, 1825 – August
19, 1905) was a French academic painter. William
Bouguereau was a traditionalist whose realistic genre
paintings and mythological themes were modern interpretations
of Classical subjects with a heavy emphasis on the female
human body. Although he created an idealized world, his almost
photo-realistic style was popular with rich art patrons. He was
very famous in his time but today his subject matter and
technique receive relatively little attention compared to the
popularity of the Impressionists.
Wiki-
Archbishop Ruins Christmas for Children
"A Roman Catholic archbishop surprised his parishioners in Argentina by telling the children that Santa Claus was not real, but instead a commercialized symbol of Christmas..."
Read the story here
Congratulations Elie Wiesel, You Are A Holocaust...Winner?
Fox News drops the ball and makes a pretty retarded blunder. Fox & Friends had Elie Wiesel on their show to discuss human rights, however at around the 0:54 mark they accidentally combined Holocaust Survivor with Nobel Peace Prize Winner with the outcome of the term, Holocaust Winner.
Watch the video below
Wednesday, December 22, 2010
Finally The Congress Learns To Get Along And Then Comes January
I don't know if anyone else has sensed it but I believe that
the two sides of the aisle have finally learned to get along
and the result is what the electorate likes to see and that
is compromise and getting the job done.
START Treaty, Taxes, DADT, Unemployment.
But wait, could this be only a temporary reprieve, come
January everything changes.
A Letter From Dumb Ass!
Dear richardporter,
I would very much like to post on your blog but to be honest
with you it all seems so complicated what with having to compile
words into sentences and further still perhaps and god forbid
sentences into paragraphs. I'm frightened to death of paragraphs
if truth be told.
And then to add insult to injury you're also asking that a photo
accompany the post. Are you insane? Don't you understand
that there are only 24 hours in the day. Who in the world has
such free time on their hands?
richardporter, I think you're asking for the impossible but good
luck nevertheless.
Signed,
Dumbass
Looking For Humor Writers To Post On My Blog
I'm looking for blog enthusiasts and humor writers like
myself to partner with on my blog.
This is a non-paying position in the beginning until we jointly
attract enough traffic to the blog and then we'll target
advertisers.
My blog is a left leaning blog covering politics, popular
culture, and humor.
Looking for a person to assist me in posting content in the
form of text, photos, and video.
You need to be able to produce several posts each day.
Preferably you already have a blogger account.
I live in Jax Bch Fl, so the closer you are the better.
BREAKING NEWS: Matt Drudge And Andrew Breitbart To Join U.S. Marine Corps
In a gesture to lend credence to their conservative principles
and to celebrate the passage of the repeal of DADT Matt
Drudge and Andrew Breitbart have joined the U.S. Marines
in the buddy program.
NaplesNews Blogger Pamela Grothaus Announces She Will Defect To East Germany!
After posting inflamatory and bigoted statements regarding
the repeal of DADT Fraulein Grothaus will return to the
"Vaterland" (translated into English - Fatherland).
Investigative Journalism by richardporter
Breitbartwhine by richardporter
During a confrontation between Andrew Breitbart and Max
Blumenthal at the CPAC Conference held February 2010
I noticed a strange sound coming from someone in the
background. If you have any information on who emitted this
sound please let me know. Because I heard the same sound
in Dade County during the 2000 Presidential recount. And I
just want to confirm whether it's the same person.
Tuesday, December 21, 2010
Chamber of Commerce Villian Behind 9-11 Healthcare Bill Death
As I mentioned previously, I was appalled that this could occur while heroic men and women suffer, to help shave money off the growing deficit. After these new revelations though, I am irate to think that foreign businesses saving on taxes was truly behind the act of killing this bill.
Everyday I am beginning to realize more and more that our politicians and government officials don't give two shits about us anymore. Human life and suffering no longer equate if it is bad for business and profits.
Read the full story here
My Statement to Pamela Grothaus
Pamela,
Your article, So Much for the First Amendment! was brought to my attention earlier today. After reading the quoted text from your original article, that was (gasp!) removed from the site I don't find it surprising that it was removed. At first I had thought about contacting you for the full transcript myself before writing up a rebuttal, but judging just by the two paragraphs quoted on this site alone, I am pretty positive that I am correct in my assumptions that there couldn't have been any sort of intelligent point contained in the words that you shat out and called an article.
Your article, So Much for the First Amendment! was brought to my attention earlier today. After reading the quoted text from your original article, that was (gasp!) removed from the site I don't find it surprising that it was removed. At first I had thought about contacting you for the full transcript myself before writing up a rebuttal, but judging just by the two paragraphs quoted on this site alone, I am pretty positive that I am correct in my assumptions that there couldn't have been any sort of intelligent point contained in the words that you shat out and called an article.
Back By Popular Demand - Fire in My Belly, a short film by the late David Wojnarowicz
Fire in My Belly de David Wojnarowicz, Diamanda Galas
Uploaded by altimsah. - Discover more animation and arts videos.
"A Fire in My Belly," by the late artist David Wojnarowicz,
is included in "Hide/Seek: Difference and Desire in American
Portraiture," a show at the Smithsonian's National Portrait
Gallery to run through Feb. 13.
UPDATE: The Smithsonian yanked the video, dubbed
"hate speech" by Catholic League president William
Donohue, who got incoming House speaker Rep. John
Boehner to bitch to the Smithsonian.
QUALIFICATION (As left in comment section):
Please correct this information. Diamanda and David never
met, never collaborated. The version does not represent the
original, nor was it authorized by the estate.
Statement from the Fales Library regarding the correct
information: http://blogs.nyu.edu/library/sp.collections/
The soundtracked version with vocals by Galas is inaccurate.
Thank you.
The Republican Party or The Gang That Couldn't Shoot Straight
If the Republican Party had more tactical flexibility in its
candidate selection and legislative strategy, nothing like
health care reform would have succeeded. Luckily, as
Yglesias notes, the structure of the conservative movement
is such that it is only able to criticize left deviation and never
right deviation, even when right deviation created a worse
outcome by conservatives' own terms. The primary challenge
against Specter, in particular, was an utter disaster, yet you
simply never hear Republicans admit this.
Press Here To Read Article!
Meet Florida's Favorite Bigot And Eyesore Pamela Grothaus [UPDATE:]
UPDATE:
Press Here To Read Pamela's Reply To My Post
Press Here To Visit Richard Porter's Blog!
"Folks, it looks like political correctness has scored another
victory at the expense of morality and religious freedom.
In-your-face homosexuality will soon be given the green light
in our armed forces. What’s next? A pedophile platoon? A
bestiality battalion? A man-boy-love marching band? Let’s
bring ‘em all out of their dark little closets and onto the
battlefield—with special benefits and treatment to help them
feel good about themselves, of course! [snip]
"So hold on tight, as America slides even further into the abyss
of political correctness, while homosexual soldiers worldwide
prepare for a colossal coming out party at taxpayer’s expense.
Oh, yeah, there’ll be federal dollars wasted on this nonsense—
can’t wait to see the price tag on that. and all of this hoopla so
that soldiers who like to have sex with those of their same gender
can display pictures of and coo over their same-sex lovers’
photos, as if that makes them “normal” to the rest of us. (Nah,
we’ll just wait until you leave the room and gag.) - Naples Daily
News blogger Pamela Grothaus.
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